2. Is drinking making your home life unhappy? Well let's see. I successfully secluded myself from my friends and my family on a regular basis to drink 40's by myself. I wasn't hurting them directly, but I'm sure they hated the fact that I shut them out completely. I wasn't unhappy because I was passed out all the time, but they were unhappy so we'll go with yes.
3. Do you drink because you are shy with other people? Umm, only when I want to get laid, which is ALL the time because I was a sluuuuuut.
4. Is drinking affecting your reputation? It was all good until I started sleeping with people that I clearly shouldn't have been sleeping with while I was drunk....so yes ma'am
5. Have you ever felt remorse after drinking? Doesn't everyone?!
6. Have you ever got into financial difficulties as a result of drinking? Always! I was infamous for hundreds of dollars in bar tabs.
7. Do you turn to lower companions and an inferior environment when drinking? Well to me a threesome relationship with pill poppers was perfectly acceptable. But in hindsight, I deserve better. Perhaps a threesome relationship with normies this time?
8. Does drinking make you careless of your family's welfare? Obviously! i never showed up to shyyyyt...I missed family life on a regular basis including parties (mostly my own), weddings, funerals, etc.
9. Has your ambition decreased since drinking? If I was required to do any sort of work, you could have counted me out. It was cutting into my bar hopping time.
10. Do you crave a drink at a definite time? Let's see, at 4pm, at 7pm, right before 2am, and ALL DAY ON THE WEEKENDS.
11. Do you want to drink the next morning? Duh! That's called rallying and what a better way to start of your day than with a mamosa.
12. Does drinking cause you to have difficulty sleeping? I wouldn't say difficulty sleeping as much as I would say waking up from a mini-coma.
13. Has your efficiency decreased since drinking? Clearly. It was physically impossible to get anything done without taking aderol. Life is just super hard sometimes.
14. Is drinking jeopardizing your job or business? I was almost fired in December, so yeah I'd say so. I have a physical piece of paper showing that I was the worst adjuster in the country. I need to frame that shit. It was hard work being that bad at my job.
15. Do you drink to escape your worries or trouble? I drank to escape, be happy, and make friends.
16. Do you drink alone? No, the TV is on the majority of the time.
17. Have you ever had a complete loss of memory as a result of drinking? Yeah, in Vegas twice, New York a million times, San Diego twice, and I think I was driving all those times.
18. Has your physician ever treated you for drinking? NO, finally something that's a no! But it was suggested that I check out A.A. if I really wanted to stop drinking.
19. Do you drink to build up your self confidence? Umm, yeah I was not a confident person sober. But when I was drunk, I was the SHYYYT.
20. Have you ever been to a hospital or institution because of drinking? No, but as a result of drinking yes. I have gotten into plenty of fist fights or allergic reactions for taking the wrong unprescribed meds.
**If you have answered yes to any one of these questions, there is a definite warning that you may be an alcoholic.
If you answered yes to any two, you are an alcoholic.
Just try to take it and lie...you'll still fail.
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